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接到江绥电话的时候，我没想到那头会是沈晓溪
清甜的声音从听筒传来林小姐
江绥喝醉了，你可以来接他一下吗
我没功夫细想沈晓溪怎么解锁了江绥的手机，只是气极反笑
意思是我白天主持完我妈的葬礼，晚上还要当滴滴司机接送他是吗
我突然意识到，我确实爱江绥爱得毫无尊严
从前不管多晚，他那些朋友一个电话，我就到了，然后把酒局上烂醉如泥的江绥带回家
但接到沈晓溪的电话还是头一回
好啊，地址发我吧我笑了一声
然后从容挂电话，关机
推开窗点了支烟
深吸一口，冷风一同灌进肺里
江绥不喜烟味
而我第一次抽烟要追溯到十年前
十八岁的时候，我妈突发乳腺癌
我和江绥刚入横店，跟身边人把钱借遍了，也凑不够医药费十分之一
一个小有名气的导演找上我，说钱不是问题
前提是我要献身
他说这话的时候眼睛眯成一条缝，笑容猥琐而且邪恶，我差点吐出来
那天我在医院睁着眼坐了一宿，隔壁病床的小伙递给我一支烟
天亮前我想，闭上眼……应该吐不出来
能救我妈，怎么样都行
于是跟小伙借了火，打算抽完再走
吐出第一个烟圈的时候，江绥出现了
他恶狠狠一巴掌打掉我嘴里的烟，看我的眼神比以往更冷漠
但他甩了一张卡给我
江绥说他被一个大剧组选中了，提前预支了工资
他冷笑你犯不着贱得去卖了
就是这天，我突如其来爱上了江绥
很奇怪吧，毕竟他那么骂我
但也有迹可循，因为他救了我妈，某方面也救了我，我爱上他，还算情有可原
那以后我成了江绥的一条狗
他要我往东我绝不往西
他说看到我抽烟会恶心得想吐，我就再没碰过
直到今年我妈乳腺癌复发
我有很多的钱
很多，但没用
接到病危通知时，我点了一根烟，然后一发不可收拾
思绪回到现在
夜幕里的都市霓虹灯闪烁，被吐出的白雾缭绕着
冷风吹得人打了个激灵
我有些恍然
这么些年，爱啊恨的，就像人在黄粱中燃着做了一场梦
小说《你的婚戒，硌到我了》第4章试读结束。
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